By Laura Campbell
The sight of so-called eco-warriors being used as impromptu pooper-scoopers as they were dragged off The Mall whilst attempting to interfere with the Queen's Horses during the Trooping of the Colour parade in London last week, brought a snigger of delight to my frozen nostrils.
You can read all about it in the world news further down, but during the parade, which was part of Queen Elizabeth II's 70th Jubilee, a gang of Green freaks jumped the crowd barriers and started to buzz around the mounted troops like those nasty little flies which hang around over ordure of all varieties.
The Bobbies swung into action fairly quickly, but as it is the practice of Extinction Rebels and their ilk to sit down to block roads, the coppers had to drag them off by the legs, whilst these Tikok addicted morons filmed themselves with their smartass phones "bravely fighting for the future of Planet Earth".
At least one of these protestors managed to gather up enough fresh horse manure on his jeans to start his own organic gardening supplies business, or, if the jeans are ever washed, collect enough compost to feed his little cannabis plot for a year. Have a look at the pics and videos and you'll agree that this episode adds a whole new meaning to "skid marks".
Apart from the riffraff being silly, the celebration of HM QEII's 70th year on the throne went off rather well, the pomp and pageantry reaching unequalled heights. Among the highlights of the four-day binge was an open-air concert outside Buckingham Palace attended by the heir apparent HRH Charles the Prince of Wales as well as the next lot in line, Prince William and his family.
Elizabeth was unable to attend all of the events, which is not surprising as she is, as William pointed out, close to 100 years old , and has recently recovered from a bout of covfefe. She did, however make an appearance on the famous Bucks House Balcony, from which Royals have greeted their subjects for a century or more. The roar of approval from the thousands gathered around the Palace was actually quite astounding and even if they didn't know all the words, the crowd gave Her Majesty a stirring rendition of God Save the Queen, which apparently brought a wee tear to her eye and caused her say, according to lip-readers: "How amazing!"
It reminded me of the Queen's visit to Bulawayo back in October 1991 when half of the city turned up to see her and Prince Philip the Duke of Edinburgh arrive at the airport, while the other half were lining the streets of the town to catch a glimpse of HM, who had visited this country in 1947 in the company of her father King George VI and Elizabeth Bowes Lyon the Queen Mother. Princess Margaret, younger sister tagged along. Memories of this visit linger still in the city with such places as the King George VI Memorial Home and School for disabled children the Princess Margaret Clinic, Queen Elizabeth house for the elderly and so on.
Being employed at The Bulawayo Bulletin of fond memory back in 1991, I spent much of that weekend charging round after the royal entourage in the faithful Renault 4 and even went to the church service attended by the Queen at St John's Anglican Cathedral on the Sunday. That was a tough call as most churches start doing stuff way too early.
A few days after all this, I was pleasantly surprised to find this large and very posh-looking envelope awaiting me in the Bulletin's mail basket. (In those days we didn't even have e-mail. Letters still arrived with a chap on a red bicycle carrying a leather postal bag.)
Within the envelope was a gilt-edged (nog-al!) rectangle of high-quality paste-board embossed with a crown and the Queen's insignia, EIIR. "The Master of the Household is commanded by Her Majesty to invite ...."
So, having chiseled the airfare to Harare out of our publisher by persuading him that it was all for the greater glory of the 'paper, off we went to Harare whither members of the local 4th Estate has been invited to a reception by the Queen. In those days I actually had a rather smart skirt-suit ... what my old Granny called a "costume" ... which could have been designed as the ideal outfit for a garden-party with royalty. I also had high heels, which matched.
We, the local Press, more accustomed to denims and T Shirts and takkies, all rocked up at State House looking jolly posh and were greeted on the steps by the Q, complete with her trademark white gloves, designed for mass-handshaking . I think I sort of managed a curtsey in the approved fashion and wandered off to join my fellow hacks for orange juice and cucumber sarmies in a large marquee on the State House lawn. The Master of the Household being obviously well-acquainted with the dipsomaniac habits of those who write for a living, had wisely decided on innocuous beverages for this occasion.
So the Queen circulated about the tent with a smile and greeting for all, while we stood around wandering what to do with our hands as cameras and notebooks had been banned.
The rule is when meeting the Queen you don't speak unless spoken to, so it was lucky for Liz that as she approached our group, the heavens opened and a downpour of epic proportions set the State House gutters gurgling and gushing. It gave her a beautiful opening and she asked: "I'm sure you could do with some of this in Bulawayo!"
"Yes, Ma'am, replied the hick from the sticks. "But it's rather early in the season and we would much rather have gentle rains to start with to get the grass growing and prevent soil erosion."
Readers who were alive at the time might recall that Bulawayo and Matabeleland were then in the grip of yet another severe drought. It had rained lightly in Bulawayo on the day of HM's arrival and this downpour in Harare just convinced me that Bamabazonke was getting more than its fair share, as usual!
While I hadn't been prepared to chat with the Queen, I had certainly not thought to give her a lecture on soil conservation. I was impressed 'though that she knew enough of Bulawayo's woes to pick a subject to ask about on the spur of the moment ... even if it was that perennial English topic, The Weather!
Granny, aged 91, was fairly chuffed when I returned to Bulawayo to relate to her the latest exploits and show her the "costume I'd worn (with stockings and everything, except for the hat. I didn't think my battered trilby which had seen too many dunkings in the waters of Kariba would really "go" with the shoes).
Ancestors of mine going back several hundred years served in cavalry and infantry regiments, so the military parades which accompany all Royal events are of especial delight. No wonder then that I spent more time looking at the magnificent horses in the 70th Jubilee parade than the "costumes" of the Windsor Women. Although I do seem to recall that Kate was wearing a small umbrella on her head at the Service of Thanksgiving.
Good on the horses this year for laying a perfect minefield for the Klimate Kreeps and what a pity, I thought, that the animals are so well-trained that not one of them took it into its head to lay a hoof on the hoi polloi!
Thank you Laura!!
The first two books of the Stone Hills series - All the Way Home and Wild Honey by Bookey and Richard Peek - are available, new, plus our National Geo video Raising Hell, all at $10 each. Please whatsapp +263 712 615 582.
2) Condolences/In Memoriam/Wreath Funds
Mrs Hogan passed away very quietly and very peacefully this morning. Her dementia had got so bad that she could no longer speak or eat . Her death was a big relief for all of the family who have watched her quality of life drift away. She died in her warm bed whilst Her daughter Sheila sat with her.
She would have been 88 on June 29th. No funeral plans as yet but will share once we know!
*R.I.P. Mrs Margaret Hogan*
To all friends and family who knew Hugh Squair he had not been doing too well for a little while his heart had run a good race considering he had a triple by pass when he was forty. His quality of life had diminished to a large extent. So he rests now where no shadows fall
ANDREA ROBINSON (nee Constandinos)
Please come and celebrate the life of Andrea Robinson
Wednesday 6 July 2022 11.00 am to 1.00 pm
The Bulawayo Club
3) Notices and Events
ZIMBABWE ACADEMY OF MUSIC & PERFORMING ARTS BULAWAYO
Tel: 2260684 / 2267195 E-mail: mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org
Supper is available before DVD showings but please remember that orders for evening meals must be placed in advance.
The Note is open every day from 8.30 for coffee, snacks, light meals etc. and also does outside catering.
Further details from email@example.com - or phone 0774 004 449 / 0771 048 995.
CHANGE OF PLAN!
There will be no DVDs at the Academy in the week 26 June-2 July. The hall has been hired for a church conference throughout the week, and, given the continuing cold weather (and discouraging forecasts), we've decided not to use Room 25 but to cancel. The DVDs scheduled for the week will be shown later in the year. Normal activities will resume in July in the hopes of warmer weather!
THURSDAY 7 JULY AT 6.30 P.M. STAR TREK: INTO DARKNESS
When the USS Enterprise crew is called back home, they find an unstoppable force of terror from within their own organization has detonated the fleet and everything it stands for, leaving our world in a state of crisis. With a personal score to settle, Captain Kirk leads a manhunt to a war-zone world to capture a one-man weapon of mass destruction. As our space heroes are propelled into an epic chess game of life and death, love will be challenged, friendships will be torn apart, and sacrifices must be made for the only family Kirk has left: his crew.
FRIDAY 8 JULY CHER LIVE IN CONCERT - FAREWELL TOUR 2002
Nearly two dozen live tracks from her 2002 tour! Cher revisits classics and new favourites: Bang Bang, a Sonny & Cher medley, All or Nothing, Believe, Strong Enough, If I Could Turn Back Time, I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For, and many more.
If her 2002 tour really was her last - and after being 'an evil frickin' diva for 40 frickin' years', as she puts it, she just might mean it - Cher has definitely left us something to remember her by. In the course of this 92-minute, she wears enough different costumes and wigs to outfit a small (if rather odd) town, surrounds herself with dancers and acrobats galore as well as, shows clips from her old TV series. Oh, and she sings too, covering everything from the Sonny & Cher years to her early solo career and her renaissance as a disco diva via 'Believe'. Bottom line: The Farewell Tour is a dynamic, sometimes silly, always entertaining show. As Cher herself notes, Britney, J-Lo, and all the others have a tough act to follow. [Sam Graham]
Thursday 14 July Jersey Boys
Friday 15 July Queen - Live at Wembley, 1986
Thursday 21 July Robbie Williams - Live at Knebworth 2003
Friday 22 July The Signal - premiere of Zimbabwe's first Ndebele Sci-Fi Short Film!
Thursday 28 July Young Winston [released on 28 July 1972]
Friday 29 July Rock of Ages - Musical
Saturday 30 July Academy Student Concerts @ 10.15 & 11.00 a.m.
5) Roses And Raspberries
6) Pets Column
8) Bulawayo News
9) Harare And Gweru News
10) Wining, Dining and Coffee Houses
11) Property For Sale or to Rent
Hillside House for sale
For sale is a 3 bedroom 2 bathroom house, set in a quiet cul de sac in the sought after suburb of Hillside. Close to several schools and shopping centres.
Sitting on 2578m , the main house features Oregon pine sprung floors throughout, an enclosed sun lounge, main lounge and dining room with fireplace, office, newly renovated shower room, main bathroom with antique ball and claw bath and toilet, as well as separate guest toilet.
Each of the 3 bedrooms have plenty of storage space in the form of built in cupboards.
The bathrooms have fashionable screed floors.
The kitchen is a good size, with double sink, plumbing for a washing machine and extensive cupboard space. A 200l solar geyser with zesa back up services the main house.
2 of the entrance doors are equipped with wheelchair ramps. A generator changeover switch is installed.
The spacious self contained cottage features a main bedroom with full ensuite bathroom and walk in wardrobe, a large second bedroom, a full size kitchen and pantry and an openn plan lounge and dining room. The cottage has fashionable screed floors throughout. The cottage has a separate electric board which can be split from the main house if required.
A single storeroom and 2 room staff quarters with shower, toilet and large courtyard complete the buildings of this property.
7500l water tanks with booster pump service the entire property. It features a waterwise garden which requires little maintenance and is drought resistant. The back garden features numerous mature fruit trees. There is a well which will require a pump.
A secure parking area is separated from the main garden by 2 security gates.
The property is secured by walls on all sides, razor wire, and an electric gate.
This property would make an ideal purchase for a family looking to make an extra income from renting out the cottage, or indeed for a large extended family looking to live close to one another. The area is quiet, safe and secure.
Price: USD165 000.00 negotiable for cash payments.
Serious buyers only to contact +263 784 045 661
RODOR PROPERTIES (PRIVATE) LIMITED
5A, 9TH AVENUE, BULAWAYO
HOUSES FOR SALE
KUMALO - $220,000 - Brick under tile, four bedroomed house, three bathrooms, dining room, lounge with fireplace, recently fitted kitchen, scullery, walk-in pantry, double domestic quarters, double carport, functional borehole, (empty) swimming pool, separate large games room/entertainment room, 2 solar geysers, electric gate, house fully alarmed.
Jojo tank. Excellent vegetable garden, Stand Size: 3176m Cottage: 2 bedroomed cottage, kitchen, 2 bathrooms, solar geyser. 3 KM from City Centre.
KUMALO: Situated in the prestigious suburb of Kumalo, this brick- under- tile home in excellent condition
includes three bedrooms, lounge, dining-room, study/TV lounge, and well fitted kitchen with pantry. There is a
double carport. The property is situated on 4465 square meters, and the attractive garden is well-maintained by
means of a borehole. The property is well-secured with brick walls and palisade fencing, and electric gate.
Asking price $200,000
FLATS FOR SALE
CBD -$41,000 - One bedroom, lounge, dining room, bathroom, kitchen, enclosed veranda.
TOWN HOUSE - $80,000 (Choice of three) Two bedrooms, lounge / dining room, fitted kitchen, pantry, complex borehole.
STANDS: FOR SALE
UMGUZA - $130,000 : 5 acres
MONTGOMERY - 6 acres, with seasonal borehole $50,000
KINGSDALE - $30,000 : 4465m
COMMERCIAL PROPERTY FOR SALE
CBD - $185,000 (Robert Mugabe Way)
Valuable property for sale, 5 Offices, 3 storerooms, ladies and gents toilets.
OUT OF BULAWAYO - PROPERTIES FOR SALE
BINGA - $250,000 Stone under thatch, 4 bedrooms, sparkling swimming pool, fenced and gated
BINGA - $100,000 BUT, 3 bedrooms, swimming pool, fenced and gated. Gazebo.
BEIT BRIDGE - $110,000 (NEGOTIABLE) Brick under tile, 3 Bedrooms, lounge, carport
for 4 vehicles, enclosed veranda. Cottage. Property is walled and gated.
HWANGE - $85,000 Built on Baobab Hill, close to the Baobab Hotel, 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms,
fitted kitchen, fenced and gated.
For these and other properties for sale phone (029) 2274581/3 (landline), Kelvin 0773 366 207,
Bryan 0772238431, Probity 0782119972, email firstname.lastname@example.org or visit us on Property Book
We are registered with the VALUERS COUNCIL OF ZIMBABWE, and offer a complete and
efficient service of Property Valuation for any purpose.
For Valuations, phone (029) 2274581/3 (landline), 0772238431, or email email@example.com
Our Property Management staff will be happy to assist you in securing suitable tenants for your
property, and managing it thereafter. At present we have
CBD - Bachelor flat: US$300 Available Immediate
UPPER RANGEMORE 15km from Bulawayo City Centre. Plot 12.5 acres to let. 2 functional boreholes,
solar geyser, fitted kitchen: US$700 negotiable Available Immediate.
Donnington - double storey - factory/offices/good parking area situated on 6000m of land
Must be seen to be appreciated - Full details on enquiry
COMMERCIAL PROPERTY WANTED
Factory/warehouse/offices, for mining concern.
If you can assist kindly contact us on 2274581
For information on properties available for renting, or if you wish to place your property on our
letting list, you are invited to contact us on (029) 2274581/3 (landline), firstname.lastname@example.org
or email@example.com, or visit our offices at 5A 9th Avenue, between Robert Mugabe Way and
Josiah Tongogara Avenue. Hours of Business: Monday to Fridays: 8am - 4.30pm
Saturdays: 8am - 11am
WE NEED PROPERTIES FOR SALE AND TO RENT.
FOR REGISTERED BUYERS AND TENANTS
12) Accommodation in South Africa
12b) Accommodation in Botswana
13) Accomodation and Travel In Zimbabwe
14) Catering and Food
15) Vehicles for Sale and Hire
16) Travel and Tours
17) Computers And Electronics
18) Lifts Wanted And Offered
19) Seeking Friends
20) Situations Wanted and Situations Vacant
Customs Clearing Clerk
Duties & Responsibilities
Classifying tariffs & advising Supervisor the appropriate duties.
Capturing data and registering Bills of Entry.
Writing of reports weekly.
Updating relevant stakeholders on their customs cases.
Attending to all ZIMRA queries and
liaising with ZIMRA on ASYCUDA
Invoicing of other extra charges incurred after clearance at the border
100% quoting of clients and follow ups.
Qualifications & Experience
Diploma in Customs Legislation and Procedures or any other relevant qualifications
At least 1 year experience with traceable reference.
Computer literacy: Excel and ZIMRA ASYCUDA.
Good analytical and report writing skills.
Email CVS to firstname.lastname@example.org and copy in email@example.com.
I am a 30 year old single mom seeking employment as a sales rep, marketing officer, receptionist , cashier or secretary.
I have 6 O levels Maths and English inclusive..I have a certificate in Sales and Marketing Management with Byo Poly.
I am currently in my final year studying for Business Management and Information Technique.
For calls 0779028746
Mature lady, hard-worker. Able to work under pressure with minimum
supervision. Computer literate, 6 O levels and Pitman Diploma in
Secretarial Studies. Please contact 0719 476 038
Well spoken lady seeks employment as a house-keeper / child-minder.
Able to do basic cooking. Stay out preferred. Please contact 0774 776
360 or 0714 565 086
Mature lady well spoken lady seeks employment as a
housekeeper/childminder. She is able to do basic cooking and baking.
Very good with children, able to help with the elderly as well.
Available to start immediately, stay out preferred. Please contact
07723 598 971
Mature, hardworking lady seeks employment as a nurse aide / caregiver.
Has years of experience with one on one nursing with patients. Has
worked at Queen Mary and has references available. Willing to do day
or night duty. Please contact 0771 012 498
Bookkeeper/Office Administrator Required.
Must have experience in
Sage Paste to Trial Balance, All Statutory Returns
Wages and Returns, Internet Banking, Sales Invoicing, Debt Collecting,
Computer Literate. Be able to work on their own
Mid 40 - 50 years of age and have own transport.
Please send CV to firstname.lastname@example.org before 20th June.
Only successful candidates with be replied to.
A mature lady with many years experience in the Secretarial /
Administration field seeks a suitable morning only position. Available
Monday - Friday 8:00 am to 2:00 pm
Kindly contact call/whatsapp 0783295334
Sales negotiators wanted to join a Real Estate Company based in Bulawayo. Applicants must have a qualification in Real Estate. Membership to REIZ will be an added advantage. Remuneration to be disclosed to shortlisted candidates. Email CV's to email@example.com.
I am a lady aged 35 seeking care work in Bulawayo, preferably house calls for the elderly or to take care of children.
I am a certified nurse aide from St Johns. Please contact me on 0773216899
I am a lady aged 35 seeking care work in Bulawayo, preferably house calls for the elderly or to take care of children.
I am a certified nurse aide from St Johns. Please contact me on 0773216899
Mature class 1 driver(retested) with more than 5 year experience
Mature lady ,aged 60 years of age with many years of experience in the
Secretarial /Administration field seeks a suitable position. Holder of
a class 4 Drivers licence. Available to start work immediately.
Mature, friendly lady seeks employment as a house-keeper / childminder. Able to look after children and your precious pets. Live out preferred and able to start immediately. Please contact 0777 101 903 (call or app) or 0773 886 410
I am 42 yrs and a holder of a clean class 1 drivers licence experience in both local and cross border my contact is 0712359715
BOREHOLE AND WATER SERVICES
For all domestic, industrial and farming water installations, please contact
Bancroft and Neil Water for an efficient and professional service. Our products
include, Borehole drilling, Pump installation, Pump repairs, Capacity testing,
Spares, and Bulk water delivery.
Contact: Vusumuzi Sinyoka on 0772775136, or Wonder Chikware on 0773490818.
ANTE NATAL CLASSES, BABY VACCINATIONS and BIRTH ATTENDANT/ DOULA
I teach a set of 5 classes covering pregnancy, labour, baby care, breastfeeding and other information. I also do a "crash course" for out of towners.
These classes are valuable even if you're having an elective CAESAREAN SECTION!!
Please book early.
I can be with you at the hospital when you're in LABOUR to help you to cope!
I also work part time at a BABY CLINIC :-)
For any further information contact SISTER JAN JOHNSTON on (09) 466741/2 from 8 am til 12 pm Mon to Fri
or (09) 2237240, 0712 728 350 or 0772 749 749 (w/app) or email me on firstname.lastname@example.org
22) Health And Beauty
24) Miscellaneous For Sale
25) Wanted To Buy or Hire
26) Clothing And Fashion
27) Boats and Fishing
28) Garden, Decor And Home
Kraal manure $2.00 a 50 KG bag.
Free delivery over ten bags.
Phone Ollie on 0771289677
JILL'S SUPER ORGANIC COMPOST
99% WEED FREE
EXCELLENT FOR POTS, VEGETABLES, FLOWER BEDS, SEEDLINGS AND LAWNS.
WILL DELIVER 5 X 50KG BAGS OR MORE LOCALLY.
CONTACT JILL AT 2246688 OR 07784955 99
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