Picture 'Little Old Lady' pulling up to the ATM in Bulawayo. The first time in 12 months I might add, so not sure what to expect....
Very aware of the poverty that surrounds the country, clutching handbag under one arm, and deftly and hurriedly manoeuvring my ATM card, which is then declined.....
Humpf, I checked the expiration date on the card and noted hysterically that it expires in 2040 !! Probably well after I have expired I chortled inwardly......
The folk in Zimbabwe are delightful, old friends inside the bank welcomed me with genuine fondness and a teller even accompanied me outside to the ATM to explain the 'new withdrawal rules' to me.
Apparently cash is to be drawn in three separate amounts of 800, 800 and then 400 Zimbabwe dollars!!! All was going well until I had punched in the first 800 tranch, and the machine advised me to remove my card, I thought the Fire Brigade had drawn up behind me!
The ringing noise was deafening and any wanna-be bank robber would have been immediately alerted that money was being drawn from the ATM. I hurriedly stuffed a copious number of notes (all in 20 dollar denominations) in my bag and furtively continued with the next 800 tranch! Again that fearful screeching, jangling cacophony, and by now I am thoroughly rattled. One more to go, making sure the coast was clear, I punched in the final 400. More thunderous staccato foghorn music, by now my bag was bulging with notes.
Now this excruciating, vociferous drama all took place in order to extract from the ATM, the gargantuan sum of 2,000.00 Zimbabwe dollars..which to the uninitiated, amounts to a princely US$20.00.......and one is allowed the pleasure of this transaction, but once a week!!
Note to self, find a bigger bag next time.